Reality Vs. Expectation- Being a Parent.

~ quirkymoms486

You know how when we were little and were playing house and you would dream of a beautiful picture perfect life with a spouse and 3 children living in a mansion just happy as can be? Cooking up breakfast, lunch and dinner every day on your little plastic kitchen set?

Well, all of that can defiantly happen but the reality of what your days are actually like vs. what you used to dream about??

Totally different!

Am I right?

Today I would love to talk about reality vs. expectation in the parenting world. I feel like we expect so much but then get disappointed when the outcome is different and it’s totally normal but we need to embrace the reality, because this parenting gig? Hardest thing in the world but it is just the best ever!

Expectation- My children will never throw a tantrum in aisle 5 at the grocery store.

My child will be perfect and never show their feelings or have a meltdown because that’s just embarrassing.

Reality…

HA HA…..hahaha. The minute you said no coco puffs was the minute you lost that perfection battle. Tantrums are so normal and you just have to embrace them. Haven’t you ever had a meltdown in aisle 5? You might not have shown it the same way, maybe you had a quiet one because you were so tired from working all day but had to go to the grocery store anyway. It’s just how feelings are shown and kids just like us have every right to feel…even if it is embarrassing.

Expectation- Social Media.

I made this homemade perfect meal, I must post on Instagram. My baby just can’t stop smiling right now, always so happy! I cleaned the whole entire house, I need to show it off.

Reality…

Bribing is just the best way to get great pictures I will tell you that! Oh and that perfect clean house? Yeah…that is just one area, you should see the rest of it! That perfect homemade meal I made? Only happens about once a week….if that. Social media can be so toxic, I promise you that all the perfect mama’s you think are on there all have the reality of daily life happening as well so remember…DO NOT COMPARE!

Expectation- What my kids eat.

All organic, no added sugar, fruits and veggies galore.

Reality…

Oh my goodness, I thought I could be a total organic mom and I do try to as much as I can and my son does love fruit but I mean lets get real. This kid also loves French fries and popsicles and that’s ok too!

Expectation- I will not change after having children.

I will still have my social life and pamper myself and eat healthy and exercise just like I am right now.

Reality…

Oh man this was a big one for me. More on the social life, I can’t believe how hard it is to keep up a social life with children. I feel like there isn’t even enough hours in the day to go to work and come home and be a mom and a wife! My body has changed, my thinking has changed, my whole life has changed and I am defiantly not who I was before having my baby and you know what? THAT’S OK!

Expectation- Being a mom.

I will have it all together all the time. I will be able to balance my life perfectly. I will find the joy in every situation and be the best mom ever.

Reality…

Most nights I will cry with a glass of wine wondering what I am doing wrong. I will think, how am I supposed to handle all of this? Working and being a mom just aren’t doable and I just can’t stop feeling guilty all of the time!

The Truth…

The truth is being a parent is hard. I rarely go to the bathroom alone these days. I don’t get more than a quick 5 minute shower most of the time. I feel like I am constantly cleaning or washing bottles or doing laundry and most of the time? I am just exhausted beyond repair and when I wake up in the morning? I still feel exhausted but do it all over again.

All these expecations we put out there? They just aren’t reality. They shouldn’t be though. Life isn’t perfect, whether you are a mom or not. That’s what makes life with these little’s so fun though. Yes they deserve our best, but sometimes it just dosen’t happen and that’s ok! Give yourself a break mama, you are doing amazing and you need to remember that!

Give into all of those cuddles, all of the boo boo kisses and the giggles and hugs. Also give into all the cries, the tantrums, the feet stomping and the yells because this life we call motherhood?

It’s worth it all!

Published by quirkymoms486

At Quirky Workin' Moms you will find all things lifestyle and motherhood. From the ups and downs of being a mom, kid friendly recipes, family life and fun activities for both kids and adults. Quirky Workin' Moms is here to let you know that it's ok to be a working mom, it's ok to be a little quirky and it's ok to let loose every now and then!

53 thoughts on “Reality Vs. Expectation- Being a Parent.”

  1. I love your honesty here. I don’t think women (or men) are told before becoming parents actually how hard it is. I don’t have children but I have friends and family who are recently new parents and I see how hard it is. I see the tired faces, the tears, the pain. And I don’t think its spoken about enough. Again, thanks for being so honest šŸ™‚

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  2. Hi it’s Brenda from RubyHemMinistries.com Parenting is a challenge but as a Mom who’s come out the other side I can tell you: You will grow so much and in so many different ways. That’s why I believe the saying “Children are a blessing” was created.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  3. I love this! While I have no children of my own (yet), I have seen a lot of friends beat themselves up for not meeting the expectations that they had for themselves as parents. However, as you said, it’s not realistic to expect yourself to be perfect. No parent is perfect! I’m going to be sharing this with a few people…

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  4. Expectation: my kids will not wear branded clothes or have cartoon characters on their tee shirts. Only wholesomeness for them!

    Reality: aged 3 weeks large boy in a Lightning McQueen onesie šŸ¤£šŸ¤£

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  5. These expectations and reality are so true šŸ˜‚ I’m the embarrassing husband you see in aisle 5 throwing a bigger tantrum to upstage their child’s tantrum šŸ˜‚

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  8. Oh my gosh – I hold a lot of respect for you mommas in my heart! A LOT goes into parenting and this is just yet another great reminder of all the challenges that come with. I’m sure it’s all beautiful in it’s own little ways !

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  9. I am nowhere near close to being a mom yet, but this post was so eye opening. I love that you showed us something so personal to you. And Iā€™m sure so many moms out there feel this exact way and love knowing theyā€™re not alone. I. will definitely be giving my mom an extra long hug tonight. ā¤ļø

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  12. I love this! I am not a mom yet but we hope to foster or adopt soon! I can’t wait to be a mom and know that things will not always go as planned but that’s okay too because I believe life is meant to be spontaneous and not always thought out.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  13. The social media one is so true! 5-minutes of browsing on IG and Iā€™m always like how do all these moms look so good (hair and make up well done), house so clean (although they describe it as ā€œmessyā€ but to me looks more like an organized mess lol), and has 10million posts per day!!! Like how how how do they do it lol

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  17. So much truth in this post! My boys are grown now, but Iā€™m always going to be a parent. I agree itā€™s so important to be realistic in expectations. Give grace to yourself and your family. Thanks for the post.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  18. I think the true point of this post isnā€™t even about expectations vs realities , itā€™s about not comparing yourself to other moms! Some moms DO cook every night, like me. Some moms donā€™t. Some kids DO throw tantrums in the cereal aisle, some donā€™t. Everyoneā€™s reality is different and I think the most important thing is that we root each other on, no matter what your day to day life looks like šŸ™‚

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  22. You are so absolutely right! I especially like “Expectation- I will not change after having children.” God, how I was wrong there! šŸ˜€ Thanks for sharing and stay healthy!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  27. Pingback: The Imperfect Mom.

Leave a comment